I'd say try a more minimal approach and get your strength up. As long as you're not in terrible shape, and have some type of athletic ability you should be good. Even if you just played sports as a kid then it's ok. Some people have a hard time picking up lifting so hopefully that isn't the case. I recommend something pretty basic at first. Like 3 days of lifting for a month or so to get yourself well adjusted to the workouts.
Clean and press 3 sets of 10
Squats 3 sets of 10
Chinups or pullups, as many as you can up to 30 or so over however many sets it takes
Calf raises 4 sets to failure
Bench press 3 sets of 10
Bent over row 3 sets of 10
Skull-crushers 3 sets of 10
Heavy ab work for 3 sets of 10-20
Deadlifts 4 sets of 10
Glute ham raise, these are hard as fuck so just do whatever you can. Do seated or lying leg curls if you can't do any.
Barbell curls 3 sets of 10
Bent over flyes 3 sets of 10
Have at least one off day between each of the workouts.
Also do very very light rotator cuff work on one of your off days. Look up various exercises, and do several of them. You're going to be using five or ten pounds for these. Don't skip this, and don't use a lot of weight.
The number of sets I included don't include warmups. You shouldn't fail on any of the sets, but you want to come pretty close on the last one. Use progressively heavier weights for each set. This is a real basic, but extremely effective group of exercises. You are going to be hitting every muscle in your body over the course of a week. Don't use any straps, betls, gloves, hooks, or anything except chalk if you need it. After you get comfortable with the exercises you should be able to add weight to the bar on every exercise every week. Do this for a few months, and you will be much stronger than when you started. After that you can do a more intense split for each body part. This routine is more about total strength and muscle building.